I'm lost and stupid without you.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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