lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
