Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
