this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Randomize
