i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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