Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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