yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
birth control should be required to get into college
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
