i barfeds in our rink
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
this hospital has no fireball
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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