i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
We're too hungover to prance.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
