question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Randomize
