I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
