I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
