They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
