Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Randomize
