its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
the raccoons are back...
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