im so drunk with asians
where?
always
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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