11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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