First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
someone owes me an orgasm
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
