The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Vodka?
Forever.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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