I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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