yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
