Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
