oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Who died my cat blue again?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
