he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I believe in your delicious
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
