I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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