do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
