Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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