Hey man sorry I got all grabby
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
