So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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