Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
you mean i was at the winter classic?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
