Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
