It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
