kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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