he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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