"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize