STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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