So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize
