Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Barsexuality is the new black.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
