we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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