I don't think brook has ever known best
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You're breaking my sexual little heart
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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