does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
