dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
