Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
