Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
