when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
