I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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