absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
