The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
