We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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