"it" just moved
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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